When you are trying to completely cleanse your heart of the love you have for a person, everything comes in bouts. One day you feel this sudden urge to move on, and yet the another day you just want that person by your side, and in your arms. You learn each day to curb and manage these tides of emotions that wreck havoc.
You try to look at the way how you deal with these emotions from an external view. You see yourself being happy at one instant and the next, you're crying buckets of tears knowing you didn't matter enough or cursing your luck to convincing yourself that you are okay and be glad that you got away. There are nights when you dream of them and wake up because the dreams hurt you to the extent that it's like the worst nightmare you have ever had, to the next day when you are sleeping so peacefully knowing that you will not be crying for someone who broke you, that you will not be lied to or not feel insignificant and abused. There is this hollow feeling you get at times where you want to fill it with memories of them and then at the very next instant forget that they ever existed. This is moving on! I still haven't but waiting to get there.
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