It's not a crime to fall for a person, it's not right though when they alter everything about them. It's not a wrong decision to let go, it's the right decision to make the right call. A person like this, who abuses love and makes it harder for the other to move on with their lives, is not such a nice person. A person like this will never find real happiness or 'true love', even if they continue to look for it because they will never value it even if it's facing them right in the eye.
You lose the right to question how another person moves on or how they settle back into their life after you've lied to them, hurt them, manipulated them and used them. You forfeit the right to them or their life, if any. As is the person goes through a living a nightmare every single day and just to feed some over inflated ego, you meddle with their head again. Listening to your instinct is the best thing that you can do for yourself. Listen when something inside you ticks and says 'something is not right'. You may still choose to love them, to care because real feeling don't just vanish.
What makes a person a lowly person? Have you ever really thought about it. If you hurt a person intentionally, keep tormenting them and when they retaliate suddenly they become the bad person. Are you that cheap a person that you need to demean and make another person feel bad for having real feelings for you (which you abused), finding out the truth (because you lied to them), let go of you (because you don't have the balls to really love, or take things further), means what? You want to live your own life to the fullest, because you refuse the other to live theirs. Do they not have a right to have a chance at a good life? What does this prove? only the fact that when they decided to dump your ass, it was the right decision. Yes, that's what exactly this kind of behaviour proves.
I never was one for stereotypes and I always gave a person a chance or two or three to really show who they are. But what I've learnt in my life now are lessons forged in my core. If a person loves you, you should never have to question it. If they lie to you, they will never be able to face you with the truth. If a person embodies a narrow or a vindictive mindset, uses people, plays with their feelings, they will always remain boxed in the head that shows their small mindset, their mentality. It shows where they really come from. A person who isn't capable of listening to his own conscience ( if he has one that is), will always make you question your beliefs, your worth and your love. Falling for someone's betrayal is worse than falling for them. So, no need to tell them what you think and or what you feel because when was it ever valued when you did anyway. What you can tell them, is to fuck off. That they don't deserve anything from you anymore. Whatever they got from you, they should consider themselves lucky because this was a one time love, one kind of love, genuine and pure to the core. One that they will never ever be worthy of again.
What used to hurt me the most was when my love was questioned by someone who I loved. That someone who now I know is truly incapable of loving another human being but himself. I will not compromise my love, my morals for someone who didn't even have the decency to be upfront about the truth and more over couldn't even stay true to their feelings for more than 6 months, another proof of their so called "love". No, I don't deserve a love like that. That's not even love. They will never ever experience 'true love'. That's just a rotten heart and mind trying to squeeze every bit of goodness from you to cater to their own fuel. If every single tear you cried for them gave them happiness and their eyes showed no remorse, run like hell my dear. It's not meant for you. I mean, if this is the way you treat a person who really gave a fuck about you, isn't it better that you let them go!
You should want that old school love. You should want the kind of love which did what it promised. You should want the kind of love that makes you deliriously happy. The one which burns a hole in your soul, you know the good kind of burn. The kind of love that you trust enough to know that when you fall, it will always be there to catch you or buffer your fall. The kind of love where people died for each other. The kind of love that knows how precious your tears are and will never let them drench you. The kind of love when you read about it, you want to live it. Old school love meant loving the person without any dirty games, treating them with respect and grandeur. It is the kind of love that is based on mutual trust and honesty. That's the kind of old school love you know will hold your hand when you need it the most. Even though we might find different ways to meet but love shouldn't be digitalised. That's the kind of love you should hold out for. Not the one who will berate your love over and over and then dump the guilt on you when you decide to let go. Not the one who lies to you day in and out and does not even have the courage to face you. Not the love who wants you on the side, as a treat, while enjoying a full life of his own, creating a new family. This kind of love does not even deserve a minute of your being or of your precious love. No matter what they perceive it like, it's not love, it's their convenience. But, most of all what you really hate and cannot overcome is the fact that they were the ones who did this to you. The one that you really loved. Like it wasn't easy enough to let them go knowing that you love them and cannot have them but then you are faced with the truth. No one knows what you are going through and what you are doing to steady yourself and taking all the anger within you and yet, sad as it is, still carrying a torch for them. Life doesn't prepare you for this. That's why you need vintage love. At least that either dies with you and you don't end up the one suffering alone.
Proving that you love a person takes a lot more than just convenient words that are easy to fool someone. Because when you love a person, you really love them and mean it. I know what love is and what version of love was never true. If he made you feel like you're not enough, did all the things that would hurt you, makes you lose yourself by making you believe in love again, look away. No matter how long you took it, all the hurt even though you knew you were deserving of none of it, let it go. No one should make you responsible for hurting another, the guilt for being a reason of distress in somebody else's life. What good does it bring? They are not the one because they never belonged to you anyway. The truth always comes to light. You never thought they were the bad guy. Like Taylor Swift says, that it's not that bad guys come wearing a mask or a black cape, they are the ones that make you heart tremble.
There comes a time when you see things with clarity, how every dark feeling they ever gave you, how you never really mattered, how it was okay for them to hurt you. You fight for something real and finally when you see how futile it is that's when you decide to let it go, and that is the exact time they just wouldn't leave. That's when you need your wear your armour and battle it out. If they won't fight for your heart, you should. You deserve a love that celebrates the life of both who are involved. You want to breathe and not have this bad experience yet again change who you are. You've taken years to rebuild yourself and promise yourself that nothing will ever break you again. The facade will fade. The memories will hurt, the wounds will beg to heal. You will reach for yourself and you will want a heart that can fully love, one that doesn't justify hurting others. Know that you cannot fix someone who you never broke. You cannot make someone love you. You need someone who will fight like hell for you no matter what, who will try no matter what. Till then you learn the biggest lesson of all is to love yourself. So, walk away with your head held high.
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